20 things learned from Outages

July 31, 2008 
Filed Under Geeky Articles

Via

  • Now is a perfect time to panic.
  • No matter what you may think, everyone knows it’s your fault.
  • Everyone is always losing ‘thousands of dollars’ during outages.
  • When the network is down, you burn calories at an exponential rate.
  • People who haven’t worked in the last year are suddenly desperate to get busy.
  • How many managers can you cram into your workspace?
  • When the network is down, you’ll have your answer.
  • Manager love to take up space and offer valuable ’suggestions’.
  • Ignoring these ’suggestions’ proves you don’t have what it takes for management.
  • It also means the network might be fixed sometime soon.
  • No matter what, payroll gets fixed first. There is no exception to this rule.
  • The answer to all other inquires is, “Yea, I’m working on it.”
  • Time passes in two modes during outages. ‘The crawl’ and ‘freaky lighting mode’.
  • Freaky lighting mode is while you are troubleshooting.
  • The crawl occurs after you think you’ve fixed it.
  • More than likely, it’s worse than you think.
  • Never say ‘it’s fixed.’ This is a sure sign you have failed.
  • Once you send the ‘all clear email’, is when the second shoe will drop.
  • For some reason you never expect that second shoe. No matter how many times you’ve done this.
  • Get comfortable. You are probably going to be here for a while.

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